Monday, March 11, 2013

the deets.

m: "How was school today?"
e: "It was good... here are the deets..."

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Watching "Miracle" with Grant, USA just beat Russia... Herb Brooks walks out of the arena, Mom says "I wonder where he's going?" Grant replies: "Maybe to change his pants"

Thursday, March 8, 2012

G: I'm going to bring my transformer today for show and tell 'cause I wanna do the 'meets the eye'

Monday, February 20, 2012


g: I can totally draw this (in reference to the illustration on a Wii game package)
m: Yeah, maybe you want to be an Illustrator when you grow up, an illustrator drew that.
g: Mom, I'm already going to be a worker guy and a hockey player. I can't be three things!

Monday, February 13, 2012

"Some radios have bad words in them"
- Grant Age 5

Friday, September 30, 2011

Safe Search: ON.

Ella: Mom, what if you googled "what is a weenie?" and the computer didn't know you meant hot dog and it showed you pictures of boys' privates?

Friday, February 25, 2011

The Birds and the Bees

Grant: How do boys get babies?
Mom: Well, they marry girls and the girls have the babies.
Grant: Can I marry you?
Mom: No, usually boys don't marry their moms. And beside, I'll be really old by then.
Grant: Well, it's ok, 'cause I'm gonna be a PlowMan and PlowMans don't have any kids.
Mom: They don't, why not?
Grant: They just don't. They only have Plow Trucks.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

e: I really like Tacos, especially the Mexican kind!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

g: I wish I was a girl so my private place couldn't get hurt. Mom, do you wish you were a boy so you could wear belts?

Friday, January 28, 2011

G: "When I grow up I'm going to be a police-mans... well, not actually a police mans, a plow-guy... yeah, a plow guy-- that way I can plow your driveway and bockie's driveway"
....and, we're back!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

g: I love spiderman, and he loves me too!

g: Mom, I don't like insects.

g: Ella, you're so cute when you get on the bus.

e: ....we put this paint stuff called glaze on the bowl--but not on the bottom because it would stick to the microwave.
m: you mean kiln?
e: oh yeah, kiln.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

e: what's for dinner, mom? ....and it better not involve chicken!
m: Ella, so you want sauce on your noodles?
e: NO WAY! Sauce makes me sneeze in the night

Friday, January 15, 2010

g: I like to poop.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

e: Shyla must be sniffing my shirt because it came straight from the North Pole.
j: And you think she smells the reindeers?
e: Yes, it smells like reindeers and Santa.

Monday, November 30, 2009

m: grant, no more soda for today, please.
g: (while holding a sunkist orange soda) mama, there is no soda in this pop!

Friday, November 20, 2009

giving thanks

g: mama, why this thing under my penis? (ie: scrotum)
m: I don't know, that's just the way God made it
g: Oh, thank you penis-maker-guy!!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

e: mom, anyone can marry anyone-you know.
anyone could marry someone with brown or black skin, you know.
I am going to marry Eli, and he has red hair.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

(in regard to using the private changing room at swimming lessons)
e: "We should go in there, some people might be allergic to seeing naked people"

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

g: Mom, I'm not Jack Clemons, I'm Grant David Albrecht.
K, Mom? I'm not Jack Clemons.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

e: They don't have a car [the little's in stuart little] so they use a cabbage [cab]

Friday, October 9, 2009

g: (2:10 am) mommy! you have boobies!
m: yes, grant, I do.... but you NEED to be sleeping.
g: ok.

Was that some sort of pre-pubescent dream about his mom?? eew.

Monday, October 5, 2009

e: This is the worst day of my entire life! And, Mom, don't say this is the way life is!
Emma didn't want to play with me--she is NOT my cousin anymore!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

m: ella, I have told you that I would rather you not watch this [hannah montana], please change the channel

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

g: mom, do you like my butt-crack?
g: I tooted! It's in my butt-crack!
m: ella, what are you doing?
e: Not watching iCarly!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

e: mom! I want to have my birthday party at the same place as we had it when I was 6. I really want Bella to be able to come and there are no stairs to the room--so she could come!

(bella is in a wheelchair)
e: mom! eli is not just my friend anymore--he's my boyfriend.
we really missed each other over the summer. we're going to get married.